Badass Ladies You Should Know

Find it in yourself to be a leader at least once a day - not from being bossy, but from having the confidence and empathy to know the high road and to demonstrate that path.

It will get better - in a day, year, or with a new friend. Don’t be afraid to cry and show true vulnerability. I think the strongest women are those that have no shame in pain and struggle. If you’re struggling, you’re probably a badass.

— Advice to aspiring badasses from prosecutor Fayette Mong

(Source: katehart.net)

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The judge turned to me and read his boiler plate advisory statements to me, while not so much as glancing in her direction. When he finished, he asked me what the nature of the abuse was. So I spoke on her behalf and described the escalation of the husband’s verbal, and progression of physical, habits. The judge asked me if I felt safe in my home. I said I lived alone. He asked me where my husband lived. I was not married - so I realized, he thought I was the victim. I paused, wondering how to respectfully correct him - and also tried to assess why he automatically thought I was the victim and the victim was the lawyer. It had to be race: I was the young minority female who was now stuttering and the victim was the white woman in a suit.

When I looked at the line of women waiting behind us to seek restraining orders, I noticed that they were all women of color and between the ages of 20-35. I realized how fortunate I was to be on this side of the courtroom and to be able to help all of these people who were and are literally exactly like me. I’m not criticizing the desensitized judge. I’m also not saying there aren’t male DV victims (especially since male DV and sexual abuse victims are some of the most insidiously silent, and therefore persecuted, population among us). I’m saying that in a room full of lawyers, judges, and minority DV women, I was the only minority female that had a real chance giving those women a voice - that is inspiration.

— Prosecutor Fayette Mong shares a moment that galvanized her understanding of feminism.

(Source: katehart.net)

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I failed the bar the first time I took it. I had already accepted a prosecutor position at my current job, but it was contingent upon passing the bar. I had also carved out a nice niche with my colleagues by the time I received the test results. I think I fell down my apartment stairs when I opened the failure letter. I called my mom crying that I was sure I would lose my job (and career, and apartment, etc.). But as usual, she coached me through emotional turmoil with the wisdom of logistics: “There is no time to feel sad. Get to studying for the next one. Call around and get a recommendation for a tutor.”

In my opinion, a good mother is someone who doesn’t let herself get in the way of mothering. Sure, she wanted to coddle and maybe even cry with me, but she didn’t. She told me to go after what I wanted, again and better - no, differently. So I hired a tutor. My boss allowed me to continue to work full time, with one more chance to pass the bar. So I worked from 9-5 and studied from 5-11 every night for the next three months (again). I passed. My back hasn’t been the same since; I doubled in near-sightedness, I developed carpal tunnel, and I lost a handful of relationships. But #firstworldproblems, right? The best lesson I took from the failure was that I am capable of working twice as hard as the societal norm, if I have to, and that goals are worth that amount of work, even if it means suffering some loss. 
In other words, there was never just one incident that brought me to my path of social justice.

I work in the public sector because I believe that one of the most expeditious ways to better a system of government and society is to start with the quality of care from inside the system (in other words, the quality of care our government can provide its citizens). I work in Prosecutions because I am a reaction to these stories of bitter lessons learned: systemic good can come with stop-gapping the culprits of crime.

— Prosecutor Fayette Mong describes a time she bounced back from failure and how her parents’ journey from Communist China to the United States inspired her own career.

(Source: katehart.net)

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